The Man in the Hydroplane
by Darkwintermoon
Summary: Twilight fusion with Bones. Craziness! Beware Does not follow Bones story line. Same Pairings R&R please. Don't like don't flame! Rated for language and slight nudity Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot line of this story. ON HOLD TIL I FIND MY MUSES.
1. The Arrival

**I don't own anything. I'm only using these characters created by fox and Stephanie Meyer.**

Title: The Man in the Hydroplane

Chapter 1: The Arrival

RPOV

"Stupid traffic made me late. I hope she isn't waiting for me." I said as I walked over to the arrivals board. To my dismay the board wasn't working.

"The arrivals board isn't working." I said.

Giving up I turned around looking for anyone who could tell me when the flight from Rwanda was supposed to arrive. Not finding anyone I decided to try the man at the information desk.

"Excuse me the arrivals board is not working and I was wondering if you could tell-"

He stopped me by holding up his hand. When he did I thought he was going to answer my question but he just turned back to the computer sitting on the desk next to him. Then he started talking. At first I thought he was talking to me but I soon found out that he didn't even know that I was standing there.

"I'm sorry ma'am but the 10:45am flight from Forks to New York is completely booked." He said to the women on the phone.

I couldn't believe that he was just ignoring me like that. I knew just how to get his attention. I was kind of hoping that it wouldn't have to come to that so I decided to try to get his attention first.

"Um hello." I said politely.

Nothing.

"Hello!" I said a little louder but still being polite.

Again nothing.

I sighed in frustration at the fact that I was asking with all the patience I could muster. As you can probably already tell I have very little if not none. Rosalie Hale waits for no one! And here he was acting as if I were invisible. Not to mention the fact I had to stoop so low as to have to flash him just to get him to actually do his job. Well it worked.

"Yeah, hi the arrivals board." I said smiling.

"I hope you said "excuse me" first." said a familiar voice said from behind me.

I turned around instantly recognizing the voice of my best friend and colleague Dr. Isabella Swan but she prefers Bella.

"Ah! Sweetie how was your flight?" I asked.

"It was good but I never had to flash anyone to get their attention." She said with a chuckle.

BPOV

"I already told you my name is Dr. Bella Swan I m a forensic anthropologist at the Washingtonian Institution." I said.

I was being detained by Homeland Security because they found a skull in my bag and they thought that I was a cannibal which I wasn't but they wouldn't believe me. They continued to question me until the door opened and someone that I knew walked in.

"Who the hell are you?" they asked.

"Edward Mason FBI," He said.

They continued to talk to each other. I didn't catch what they were saying because I was too pissed off to listen to them. Next thing I knew they were releasing me and that's when I got really pissed off because I had been trying to get them to let me go for over an hour and then Edward shows up flashes his FBI badge talks to them a little and they just let me go.

"You told Homeland Security to detain me just so you could come and save me didn't you?" I accused.

I was still pissed off at him.

"Yes I did," he said.

If you think I was pissed before that was nothing compared to the anger that I feel right now!

"Pull over I m getting out." I hissed.

"No." he said.

"Pull over or I'm yelling rape out the window," I demanded fiercely.


	2. Emerald Green and Flying Insects

**AN: Sorry it took so long to update but I had school and a major case of writers block. I would like to say thanks to edward-and-bella-forever for her amazing editing skills. Without her this story would not have been half as funny or good.**

**I own nothing.**

**Now on to the story enjoy.**

Emerald Green and Flying Insects

BPOV

I was still very pissed off at Edward when he pulled over just like I demanded.

"Look Bella I m sorry but will you please just get back in the car?" he asked.

I turned my head sharply, fully intended on unleashing my bubbling anger. Considering the day I just finished having (one that I would care NOT to repeat thank you very much!) I could come up with a couple of stress relievers. I could go with the classic five year old foot stomp or stick with staying angry on the inside. I decided to go with the latter to avoid the strong likelihood of public humiliation. The last thing I needed was to be arrested and taken away on charges of disturbance in a public place. _Is there such a thing?_ The last thing I needed was to be eternally embarrassed at the prospect of being thrown in the back of a police cruiser.

Just the act of turning itself was one of the worse mistakes I could have ever made. Staring back at me were the brightest pair of emeralds I had ever seen. The smallest glance made my insides begin to flutter._ Stop it Bella! What you're feeling is anthropologically impossible._ I stopped right there. What I was feeling was most definitely illogical. The stomach's basic functions were and will always remain the same. To break down the food that an organism has consumed to be more easily digested. Afore mentioned digested food would be stored as it was released at a consistent rate which would later be converted into Adenosine triphosphate thus giving us the energy to perform daily tasks and body movements. Never have I heard of the idea that such an organ would house a swarm of flying insects. Regardless I found myself unable to look away. Thinking on it now it was either take a ride with this man or call Rose who would most likely shoot out a string of pointless questions before I could even get my seatbelt on. I absentmindedly felt my body let out a shudder of fear at only thinking the idea. And I would very much like to keep my eardrums working as they were supposed to. Feeling my face contort in a grimace I grudgingly opened the door. I glared at the fact that I saw a smirk contorting his facial muscles. Fine, I grumbled.

_Damn him and his beautiful green eyes_ I thought as I reluctantly got back into the car.

"Where are we going?" I asked suddenly realizing that we were going in the opposite direction to where the institution was located.

"Tacoma," he said.

"Why what's in Tacoma?" I asked.

"The Tacoma Dome," he stated in a tone that told me he expected it to be the most basic piece of knowledge.

"And why exactly are we going to the Tacoma Cone?" I asked.

"It's actually called the Tacoma_ Dome_," he said placing emphasis on the last word. "A body was discovered early this morning in the world's largest hydroplane," he said in a serious tone.

"Oh," was all I could say. My excitement began to build at the prospect of identifying a decomposing body. _There's no going back now._ I thought with a sigh. I just wish these insects could stay still long enough for us to get there and stop creating this foreign sensation.

**AN: there you have it any questions? If I don't update soon it's probably because of school but I'll try to update ASAP. There is a poll up on my profile so check it out. Happy holidays!!**


	3. Author

**Dear Readers,****  
I want to say that I am sorry for not updating my story but I'm in the process of moving and I am having major writers block I am open to suggestions just PM me if you have any ideas about the story. I will update as soon as I can, thanks so much for reading my story. I have a poll up on my profile so check it out.  
Yours Truely,  
Darkwintermoon**


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